Thursday, January 17, 2013

Garth.

I've decided to say, "Live in the now!" in the voice of Garth from Wayne's World each day. Remember that I am afraid I won't remember my life? I think the best thing to do is live in the present. Maybe if I'm not so worried about what will come next, as most Americans are, I will remember more of my life. I want to remember the way I felt and things that I enjoy. I made a list of things that I like and I'm going to add to it this year. I'll let you know when I have an update.  So far, I have:


  • Blooper reels
  • Music that evokes emotions. Preferably with my big headphones on.
  • New sensations. I ate fresh anise for the first time and had a good experience.


I didn't make New Year's Resolutions. Not specific ones at least. I think I am setting myself up for failure when I do so. I always want to eat better and workout more. It's going to be a good year for me. I'm doing better health wise and waste wise and really loving my life. Things will come as they do and I can plan my future without forgetting about today. I know it's possible, and now I just have to wake up and remember it each day.

I can't believe it's 2013. I will have been out of high school for 7 years. I can't believe it. I'll be 25 this year. That's halfway to 30, and it scares me. I always tell myself I'll have kids when I'm 30(ish). It seems to be fast approaching now, and Chase is already turning 30 in April! I know we are still young, but I know that before we can blink we will be 60 and have grandchildren and be retiring from our hopeful careers.

Live in the now!

It's been a while.

So.

I have a headache today.

And I think I know why.

First off, I'll briefly address that I haven't blogged in months. I guess I got busy with the holidays and lazy with my logging. I'll probably regret that later. I want to start again. Sometimes I have thoughts and I want to write the thoughts down. I also have been having weird dreams lately that I should log.  Two in particular. One where I was talking a new client, Kathy, into staying in treatment. I told her she would die if she left. She was blonde, and I wonder if this will come true. That will be strange. I'll let you know.
Another where I was on the top floor of a skyscraper drinking ( I have experienced neither of these things), blackout, and wake up with no memory of what happened. My old friend Jason was there, constantly giving me hugs, and we hopped tree branches together. I want to remember these things. I have reread dreams that I have had in the past months later, and not recalled this dream in the slightest. I''m mostly worried that I won't remember a lot of my life. I have such a terrible memory, and I am worried that the days go so quickly that before I know it, I will be old and not remember the little moments. So I will start blogging again.

I don't want to write about the holidays right now. At a later time.

My headache.

I am convinced it was because of what I ate today. Last week, I did a 2-day detox. I ate mostly green things, drank lemon water, and did restorative activities. Today, I ate toast and fresh eggs with some cheese, then had some brownies for lunch. Super smart, right? Well. I don't feel good. At all. I even took 2 IBU's for my headache and it didn't help. It always helps! That's my last resort.  It didn't work. I'm convinced that my body didn't like the chemicals and fake sugars and dairy so it gave me a headache. Foo.

I'm going to do better now.